Am I Really a Hot Mess?
Am I really a HOT Mess?
I was talking on the phone with a friend of mine last week. They called me for spiritual advice. I get those calls from my friends a lot, and I love to help out. Nothing makes me happier. The thing is, in order to give good advice – it requires telling the truth in your own life. A lot of the truth and nothing but the truth. And this isn’t always easy especially when your hiding things you're ashamed of. It’s hard for us to admit when something is wrong or when we need help. Trust me… I get it. I spent many years trying to do everything on my own and I can tell you it didn’t work. It's impossible to live from a place of authenticity when you're not telling the truth in your own life.

This was always my biggest struggle in active addiction. I would get some good sobriety under my belt and then I'd relapse. Overtime this pattern started to wear on me and having to admit I failed again was embarrassing. 

I was telling my friend that in order to go deeper, they’ve got to acknowledge what’s going on and tell the truth. Not the same BS story we repeat over and over again.

Just the plain and simple truth.

When I told them this…. It brought up a lot of fear, anxiety, and doubt.
Again… I get it! The journey of self-discovery and healing is a slippery slope. It brings up emotions that we don’t always know exist. It’s so easy to bury feelings and memories from the past. 
We are so afraid of being found out! We are so afraid of being judged, and that people will know we really don’t have our shit together. Can you relate? 
And then I wondered if it is a Universal fear?
For the longest time I thought it was only me. 

Do you ever worry about being “found out”?
I did!
For years I walked around like everything in my life was great.
I was always happy. But... You would have never known deep down inside I was suffering. 
Why should I bother people with my problems is what I always thought.
Who would care anyways?
So here’s what I have to say…
You’re a mess sometimes. And that’s OK!
I’m a mess sometimes. And that's OK! I’ve learned to embrace it. 

And yet… You are also brave and wise. So am I. 
You are beautiful. You are smart, strong, intelligent and worthy of everything you desire.

And yes… We all have a past. There are parts of you that you’re ashamed of.
Me too!

But here’s what’s so awesome… When you acknowledge and share those parts is when things will start to change.

That guilt and shame turns into healing and self-love.

People are going to love us for who we are. Not who we think we should/have to be.

Our mess is our message! 

When you just let go and admit it, you can accept that you have moments of being a mess. Share that feeling of feeling unworthy at times with your support system, then you can step into a larger, happier, and freer life.

It's what I love about the recovery community. They are one of the most beautiful and safest spaces that have no judgment. Everyone has been there and done that. We are all just trying to move out of our mess and live a life of joy in sobriety. 

It's time to end the stigma around addiction. Don't be ashamed of your past and embrace your mess. It's sexy!

Live Free in Recovery


Sheri Matthews


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